When the Alleged Victim is Really a Predator
Sometimes the person claiming to be a victim, is really a predator. This predator tells a convincing story to others to gain money and favors. Sometimes the predator is cultivating emotional currency such as empathy and attention. Maintaining the role of the predator, this alleged victim seeks out others to prey upon.
This predator often socializes with other people who claim the victim status. They are often selfish and inward looking. They do not offer emotional support, but constantly ask for it. In their group, there is often a giver. Someone that is not selfish, but is very concerned about the welfare of her “friends.” The predators prey on this person. They call her at odd hours of the night. They offer guilt trips and elaborate on emotional maladies that will allegedly exasperate beyond their control, if the empathetic friend does not immediately respond and offer emotional currency. With the 24/7 on-call status of friendship the predator drains the true victim.
Power and Revenge
Selfishness exists. Sometimes people do not get what they want and in return they retaliate. It is strange to hear a child describe how they are going to kill their parent in their sleep because the parent grounded them, but I’ve heard it before. It is weird to hear a child describe how they are planning to lie about injuries in order to seek revenge for a parent taking their cell phone away. Ex-lovers make claims of sexual assault. Disgruntled employees make claims of supervisors using power of authority over them. Children destroy their parent’s reputation in order to gain attention from school administrators. Then there are the people who claim physical assault on a company employee, who they just didn’t like.
The power that a predator has over someone else is enormous. All a predator has to do is say that they are a victim of abuse. If that occurs, the victim is guilty until proven innocent.
If the victim of a predator is a child. The predator and the predator friend group will seek to destroy the child. They will elaborate to everyone on how the child has damaged them. They launch a full-on smear campaign using social media, gossip, and sympathizing adults. The victim of such an assault often falls into a deep depression. The victim feels horrible about herself. The backlash from the smear campaign is overwhelming. Oftentimes the child will attempt suicide.
Adult victims of false allegations don’t have it any easier. If the allegation takes place at work, the adult is placed on leave or fired. The company has to distance themselves or risk a lawsuit.
The victim must then look for another job. Background checks for other employment will recognize that there are charges pending. This will result in an inability to get another job.
If the victim has high enough status, newspaper articles will be written about the victim. This will result in the victim having difficulty creating their own business.
The victim can fight the allegations in court. It will only cost thousands of dollars in attorney fees. The victim will pay for these fees while they are not holding a job.
If the victim can afford an attorney, court is not fast. The victim is looking at a year before their case goes through pretrial, rescheduling, rescheduling, rescheduling, and finally trail. The victim often tries to save time and money by accepting a plea of guilty for a lessor charge.
If the victim does win the case and is found “not guilty,” then the next step is to work on scrubbing the internet of bad publicity. The internet must be scrubbed of bad publicity, or employers will still see the allegations when the victim is looking for a job.
We all must stand up against abuse. We all must protect those who cannot protect themselves. We must also realize the dirty truth is that sometimes the alleged victim is really the predator.